Rage

“Are you still dealing with the depression and that is your life focus?”

“Nobody wants to hear about your depression. People enjoy a laugh and more relaxing topics.”

“Can’t you just move on? That incident was 10 years ago.”

“Can’t you just quit thinking about it? Holding grudge isn’t good for anyone.”

“Can’t you just snap out of it (depression)?”

“Move on, I am tired of hearing what you are about to say. I’ve been there. Just snap out of it.”

“If you are depressed, don’t talk to me, talk to your therapist. At least they got paid by listening to your bullshit.”

“Can’t you just not be depressed?”

The answer to all of the above so-called conversations with my supported friends and family is to yell “FUCK YOU ALL. I am tired of the interaction and I won’t share anything personal with you anymore.” You pushed me away and also insulted me in a polite way to let me know clear enough. I got it “You are not in my support circle.” I got it, you yelled it out loud without saying it out loud, in front of me.

I got it. You never there for me when I need you the most. I shouldn’t think a second you would help me get out of the darkly depressed blackhole.

Don’t be so mean, jerks. And afterward asked me why I don’t talk to you about anything and why I am so depressed because of your existence and this damn negative world. You guys are so mean in front of my face and then expect I would smile back at you.

No. I am full of rage.

And then you expect the laugh loudest person like me to thank your constructive opinion?

No, you don’t know anything about depression, and I deserved self-respect by walking away.

“FUCK YOU”.